MISS u so MUCH

27th Feb 2010
very very very SORRY as i told u i could online @ brunei airport but actually thy dont provide free wifi... what a shit as airport...

from BRUNEI, i FLEW to AUCKLAND being inside the plane for 10 hours+/-... COULDNT STOP MISSing U... LYNN, really missed u so much on the plane... i slept inside and also woke up... TINKing of U... DIDNT HUG LYNN BEAR as dad packed it up in the luggage... had 2 meals in the plane and slept then woke up, slept and the enxt thing i knew, i'm here in AUCKLAND...

well, when i reached i texted u of course... but my phone went through some problems so i had to DLT all the msges u sent me in M'SIA... after a few mins, i found out that the phone was some sorta upside down, and so i didnt had to DLT yr msges... THIS made me SAD... as i 'm so CLUMSY and dlted yr MSGes...

shudnt have done that... well, called u again when i reached home... WORRIED, MISS n <3 u too MUCH i guess... 2mr's gonna be uni day so i slept early...

TODAY
well i woke up @ 6 am and saw yr msg and u didnt sleep @ all... waiting for me i guess... BUT u HAVTA sleep too... u BETTER get a good REST b4 waiting for me... >=3 then i woke @ 7.30 am to get ready for uni... UNI...... ISNT FUN @ all... i guess i hadnt made any friends yet so i tink it's NOT FUN @ all... then i went home for the day @ 11.30 skipping a class starting @ 12... hehe naughty me... MUM bought me a "a week pass" for buses n trains... well i'll havta be more persistent with this course as i MADE a PROMISE to U(my dear MOGU)... i BLOGGED here risking my um to come upstaris therfore i typed very fast and havta end it in a few more sentences...

ALWAYS <3ing U...

公蘑菇

the LAST day

i'm very HAPPIE as u always said u cant come out with me... but in the end, u always end up coming out... it's d last day and i hope u could come to the bbq @ my aunt's hse... and u kept saying u could not... and i kept pushing u to come to the end, FORCING U TO COME... am i being too selfish or what??? i dont really knoe if i've done the RIGHT thing FORCING u to come...

well, in d end u showed up and i'm VERY VERY HAPPIE... didnt expect ut o come... dont even noe if this'll get u into trouble with yr dad... really feel unsafe for u... i dont really want u to get HURT... i hope i could stand up for u... really really wanna protect u like a human shield...

i'm thinking if u're coming to the AIRPORT tmr, u're gonna cry, and if i see it, probably i'll END up crying too... but i noe i wont cry so easilly... i dont wanna see u cry too... i want u to LIVE happie while i'm not by yr side... i will LIVE very happie w/o u by my side... & dont worry i wont find another "LYNN" to replace u back in nz... and i hope ther's no other "ME" here... MAYB i'm jst too worried... i'm sure i shudnt be so "duo xin"... cause i noe u wont find another "ME" as i BLIF in u...

really dont wanna let go of my hands, but I noe I SHUD,
dont wanna let U out of the cage, but I noe I MUST,
wanna stay with U, but I noe I CANT,
WHAT SHUD I DO??? I JUST KNOE THAT I SHUDNT BE SO SELFISH if i really cared bout u...

<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3 U 4EVA MY DARLING

U

YES... it's U, U, U and U!!! i'm very happie we went out today for movie and kbox, i was angry @ u when u said u're not coming... i was angry @ u cos u always cant come out... but when i found out that u can come, my ANGRINESS turned into HAPPINESS... i dont know y i dont care y... as long as u're out with me by my side for these few days, i'm satisfied...

i will be here until friday only... i do really hope we could be together everyday until the day i go back to "PRISON"(well, it's bored ther so i say it as prison)... we did went through a LOT of stuff resulting us having a COLD WAR about a year ago... i really do regret having it with u... thinking back to it now, i feel really ashamed as it all started from a small misunderstanding...

i always thought of you when looking @ LYNN LYNN BEAR u gave me 2 years ago... today, u gave me another bear... i really hope that i could cherish it even more and not squash it or dirty it while sleeping... it reallyhurts me when u got dirty... it's as if i didnt cherish u and this makes me feel really really bad...

even though we were together for this short period, i really feel like i'm gonna leave u for a LONG LONG time... i dont really wish to be away from u... i'll try my best as i made my promise to u... i'll keep the promise to u, and study as hard as i can, not thinking of U, but to FOCUS into my studies, obtain a DEGREE as u said that u're the "FOCUS" of the family... yr dad LOVEs u the MOST and hopes that u'll marry some1 with a good study background... i'll try HARDER even if i have to wake up early and get back home late... i will still do it, FOR U MY <3...

even though i'm gonna be away from u, my everything always belong to u... and i'll always do what i promised u... i'm always telling u that i'm TOUGHER than u thought... THOSE are all LIES as i'm not as tough as u thought... i'm actually just a WEAKLING inside me... i just dont wanna WORRY u... actually i dont wish to see u sad and worry about me... as i'll always feel sad while u're sad and happie while u're happie...

i really regret for not being with u on VALENTINEs as i'm celebrating the 1st day of CNY with my family members... i really regret eveything as i'm not by yr side when u're sad...i really wanna be by yr side that MUCH... it's yr 1st VALENTINES day but i;m not by yr side, I'M REALLY SORRY as my laziness took control of me resulting me w/o a driving license... if i were hardworking enough, i would've brought u out for dinner on VALENTINES...

i really do hope to c u @ the airport sending me back to NZ, but i couldnt bear the PAIN thinking of you crying for me @ the airport... i really dont want u, my DEAREST one, to shed tears for me... 3 years is a short time as u've been waiting for my return for 2 years... i'll be back soon fullfilling what i promised u... bringing back that piece of paper, to marry u... even though i know what i said now doesnt actually count as we may not know what'll happen in the future... i'm tired already of finding the TRUE LOVE and i really feel that u're the PERFECT one... the 1 and only U...

my chinese isnt good so i dont type in chinese... i know u enjoy reading chinese but i could not fullfill that "desire" for u... i'll also not be able to go online when i'm back to NZ as my mum was angry @ my for scoring SHIT as results for my last year of HIGH SCHOOL... i really feel bad as MY RESULTS results me to not be able to get in touch with u drg weekdays...

MY DEAR LYNN LYNN,
i hereby say SORRY to u for my bad doings... i know what i've done to u broke what u PROMISED to GOD... i really couldnt control myself knowing that i'm gonna leave u behind, so my actions were for u to remember me...

LASTLY, to promise u that i'll not MISS u and treat u as a normal friend while i'm back when we're @ kfc are just WHITE LIES as i knoe i would MISS U the MOST and i just could not stop MISSING u... i also said i'll stop texting and calling u from NZ are just PROMISES THAT ARE MEANT TO BE BROKEN... i really wish that u would not not reply to my messages and emails... i will for sure MISS U...

<3 u always my DEAR... XoxO from Yong...


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well well yong

WELL DONE YONG... GLAD TO HEAR THAT U GOT A GF... WELL, MANY OTHERS SAID THAT TO ME... WHAT SHOULD I DO??? I'M GOING BACK ON FRIDAY... AND YET U CANT COME OUTING WITH US... GUESS WHAT??? I'M SAD... REALLY SAD... I REALLY FEEL BAD... I HAVE A FEELING OF MISSING U, LOVING U, AND MUCH MUCH MORE...

WHY DO I HAVE TO GO TO NEW ZEALAND AND LEAVE U BEHIND??? WHAT'S ALL THIS ABOUT??? WELL, IT'S MY FUTURE ISNT IT??? AND I'LL HAVE TO FULLFILL IT THEN... BUT I DONT WANNA LEAVE U BEHINGD... LETTING GO OF MY HANDS LETTING U FLY FREE LIKE A BIRD RELEASED FROM A CAGE...

DO U KNOE THAT I HATE IT??? DO U KNOE THAT I HATE IT WHEN U CANT COME OUT WHENEVER ASKED AS I'M GOING BACK SOON BUT U JUST HAVTA SAY NO!!! WHY IS THIS HAPPENING??? WHY IS IT HAPPENING TO ME??? WHY WHY WHY WHY WHY?!?!?!

I REALLY WANNA ENJOY MY LAST MOMENT WITH U... AND U... U ARE THE ONE!!! U ARE THE SPECIAL ONE!!! U ARE THE CHOSEN ONE... I REALLY WANT U TO COME OUT BUT WHY DOESNT YR DAD UNDERSTAND IT??? WHY DOESNT PARENTS UNDERSTAND US KIDS???

ANYWAYS, I REALLY HOPE U COULD GET A SCHOLARSHIP AND COME TO NEW ZEALAND WITH ME SO WE COULD BE TOGETHER, BUT I DARE NOT ASK FOR STH THAT CANT BE FULLFILLED... I REALLY WISH U COULD LIVE HAPPILY W/O MY PRESENCE... DONT CRY, DONT BE SAD... WHENEVER U'RE SAD OR ANYTHING, U SHUD HUG YONG YONG(WHICHEVER IT IS)... TEXT ME OR ANYTHING... I JUST WANT U MY DEAR TO LIVE HAPPILY... 3 YEARS WILL BE A SHORT TIME... AFTER I GET MY DEGREE, I'LL BE BACK TO MARRY U, AND THEN TAKE U WITH ME TO NEW ZEALAND... DO U WANT TO COME WITH ME??? OR DO U REJECT MY REQUEST??? WELL, IT'LL BE DECIDED IN A FEW YEARS TIME SO DONT BOTHER ANSWERING MY QUESTION...

<3 FROM 公蘑菇......

soooo loooong lazy post le.....

sum1 want come n read thn i post sth..... DUH??? this is insane..... i just woke up at 7 30 as >>> my sister wanted to snatch the headphones off me.... thn i thought if tmr i wake at 6 am earlier thn her thn jiu me use GOOD headphones?? thn jiu get scolded by parents say no... next time need follow turn so who use the shity laptop she's usin today uses the headphones... DAMN!!!

oh right....

someone special suggested that i shud update my blog n said it has been dead for almost a year now.......

well, it's not.......it's been dead for only almost half a year~~~

sometimes, i wonder/wander deep in my heart, thinking if i m alone or not........well.........

maybe yes, maybe no........

i'll just post this post n go straight to bed now........

*YaWnS*

it's now 1 35 AM so goodnitey folks~~~



for any inquiries, please contact XXX @ xxx-xxx-xxxx

LAZY to post~~~

just came by 2 drop a few lines of words~~~

cant manage to upload the photos~~~

so i'll upload it when i have the chance since mummy said we cant touch the pc for weedays when skul starts~~~

and my internet bandwidth is now passe dthe limit so i will upload it maybe in UH UH

2 weeks time?